How close together???
What can be better in life than loving someone and being loved. And moreover when the love reaches the depths of souls, so much so that the souls of the two people are connected with the same thread of love, we reach the heights of bliss and ecstacy. But being myself in a relationship and seeing my friends and others too I have observed that something prevents all of us from letting our love seep in our soul. There is a strange kind of a hesitation in all of us from embracing that love fearlessly and completely with open arms. I mean really with open arm!!. There is a hesitation in becoming one with that force of love which fills us from within and without and seeps into every cell of ours.
As I write this a vivid picture comes to my mind of a person walking in the drizzle. Have you ever seen that when it is drizzling most of us clutch our fists and hands, bow down our head and walk in a way to prevent our selves from getting wet? Have you ever noticed those lines on the forehead as a result of us tightening our facial muscles while walking in the drizzle? It seems that though we are walking in the drizzle and getting wet unavoidably but we still do those small things to prevent ourselves from getting wet. The lines on the forehead and the clutched fist is nothing but a sign of resistance to get wet, even when we know that wont help at all. And suddenly when you let go off all the resistance and fear and open your arms and raise your head to the sky the fine drops of rain slide down your forehead and onto the nose and you break free. That feeling is so great and fine. You feel one with nature and you really let the rain and bliss seep in every cell of yours.
The love in our lives is no different from the drizzle. And though we know that letting go off the resistance would ultimately take us to the path of bliss but the counter force to let go off that fear and resistance is too strong. The battles and challenges of life, though worth living, have made us individualists, it has made us highly strong headed, and at the same time has made us more rigid. We have narrowed down our individuality and our identity to our strong headed opinions, our principles, etc. And therefore we are afraid of changing and accomodating because that in our opinion would mean losing of identity. It is this which prevents us from opening our arms and raising our heads to the sky when God, through another human being has decided to shower love upon us.
All said and done. The above resistance is not completely invalid, and in many cases infact it may be your strong suit too. It may be something which helps you win in other areas of life. And moreover the term Unconditional Love may really sound heavenly but its not possible to love someone unconditionally. Two people in love may have a different view of life, different ways of working, different principles, etc. And unfortunately lack of acceptance of these differences come in the way of unity of souls in the real sense. And even if one of the person accepts the differences does not mean that the other will also do the same. And even if both the people accept the differences doesnt mean that the differences have disappeared. Trust me acceptance might lower down the resistance and increase the possibility of reaching a common ground, but it will not unite your souls completely because somewhere something is being compromised. Not only these differences but certain other differences due to the acts of God like differences in destiny, death of a loved one, etc come in the way of that blissful unity of souls.
Are we as humans doomed to an incomplete love inevitably? Or can we indeed live life in a way where irrespective of our differences we are really drenched into each other, as if sleeping naked in the same blanket in the cold winter night, where at least for sometime physically and emotionally there ceases to be any barrier?
So does that really mean that we will never be able to live that life of onness?
Below are the words of Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet. Reading these lines I have got some answers and some peace..
"You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another, but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow."
this is awesomeness to the core...i simply love the thought..As far as being one is concerned I think deep down two people in love are together and one...its just the outside world which looks at them as two seperate beings...its all a matter of the heart and once tht connects, seperation and differences cease to exist :-)
Your finest post..till now..!! Most finest post if there's any word like that..!! :) No words..!!
Thankyou Sanchi and Reedima for reading...
I love Kahlil Gibran's poem..... and the last line of the poem is my best :-)
It is always wise to accept each other the way they are...
If the acceptance is pure ... then the love between them will never diminish...
it should always be kept in mind we are humans...and every human has to be different...we are not non living thing that we must have the same prescribed qualities...
yes Ketan... rightly said that everyone is different and no one has same qualities........ and therefore to at least minimize the conflicts and love more acceptance should be high...
thanks for the read...
nice...but i kind of blocked everything due to couple of things : soul, god, oneness..
these are all concepts of which a person has no clue about...its a third party information which is being accepted without any questions...in that light, the very questions you ask will never be answered, cannot be answered, becoz the question itself is wrong...
to seek oneness is a very lovely thought but its an impossibility...why on earth wud u want a oneness?..where have u ever seen oneness? oneness doesnt exist...even ur existence is a proof that it cannot exist..we are divided, never integrated..why is there this requirement for love to be identified with oneness..
truth is, love is a lot like ur belief in god..u think u know it, will recognize it, are experiencing it, based upon different peoples interpretation of it....if we take everything apart, we both can only agree on one thing, love is an emotion...and emotions are fickle, since it tends to take on the hues of its immediate surroundings, moods, people..in short its mutable...seen in that light, u will then notice that everything u do has its source in love....but this will only become real to u if u actually see, not becoz i said it..
oh, that was me...
pravin---
i partly agree with you.... the philosophy of oneness is too large to discuss and is out of scope over here.... still i would like to tell that there are two school of thoughts.. one is the western which sees and percieves in disintegration.. the eastern sees and percieves in integration.. and here i wont drag God because thats not required.
ofcourse i agree when u say that we are individuals and in a way i have said the same when i said that everyone thinks differently and so that kind of idealism and oneness at the level of thoughts may not be possible..
and therefore i my self think that its not desirable also....
thanks for the read :-)
Awesome write yaar....U r turning into a writer or what?
You are very right in saying that something...something does prevent us from drenching ourselves with the love that we have. And amazingly its doesnt just apply to a relation where a guy and a gal are in love. I see this resistance existing in every relation. Be it amongst parent-child, friends, relatives....everywhere.
Indeed there can be many reasons to it....Some of them you have surely sought while the others still remain unseen. Society dogmas, prinicipals of life, individualness, fear of failure, all of these operate in a relationship and probably even more. While the importance you gave to them is entirely your decision... So probably these operators are nothing but complications which you eventually kill off with every step you make in a relation.
Phew....you gave a trigger to my thoughts and I ended up doing blah blah :) But take it as a compliment cuz thats the signature of a wonderful write. I am glad that you are blessed with such a mature thinking which others of your age seldom have....God Bless You dear
Take a bow cuz you truly deserve 1 ;)
tiu tiu
very well written.. the best post of yours by far.. the example of resistance to rainfall given by you to explain the concept was simply so apt.. good work.. and yes.. considering the fact that i am too am in a relation, i could very well agree with you on some points.. not elaborating further, I'd say, very good job done.. keep penning.. :-)
I have been knowing Shree Advaita for sometime , but still he is a kind of guy who is always out of integrity and writing blogs which are totally useless and waste of time . Still i look at him of all the good things and bad things in my life which is related and unrelated to him . Any ways this is an awesome article with too good a sharing which i cannot comprehend. Good show and keep writing so that i can write these kind of useless comments.